Small Bites with Family: Accidental Booze

A series of funny and interesting incidents that happen with me and my family.

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Previous posts under the same series:
This time it’s gonna be about the time when you accidentally drink infront of your parents…
What happens when someone offers you a vodka shot and you take it openly, without realizing that someone is watching you… πŸ˜›
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Now for those of you who found this title weird and think that what’s wrong in doing this, kindly consider that I come from a dry state and here no one would have ever seen me drinking before.

So this happened when I had gone to a different state for giving my presence in my sister’s wedding. This state doesn’t have restrictions on drinking and it’s very normal for people to drink.

It was sangeet night, the night when there’s open battle of dancing between bride’s side and groom’s side. Battle is namesake, everyone just wants to enjoy and dance.

We were on the dance floor and we almost had forgotten where we were and who all were watching us. Our concentration was mainly on dancing and impressing people in nearby vicinity.

But then suddenly, someone from our group comes with a bottle of water and offers it to everyone while drinking it himself. Being from a dry state, you never suspect a water bottle and humbly accept it with gratitude. So did I while taking a big gulp from the bottle, till that person took it away from me.

But as the vodka drains down your throat and every thing it touches heats up, you know that it’s too late… In my case, I came to know it a little later when it has successfully landed on my stomach bed.

I ignored it and kept dancing. Good thing is that a few gulps doesn’t do any harm / good to me. I stay sober nonetheless. I didn’t see anyone around me. But back in my mind, I knew that everyone had seen me drink from that bottle.

When my eyes accidentally met my mom’s, she immediately gestured me to come down the dance floor and talk. And I knew it will be a serious talk.

I somehow managed to keep a calm face, innocence on it. As I didn’t suspect the water bottle to contain anything else than water, so I couldn’t be held guilty, I thought.

She asked me did I drink anything that anyone else offered? This was a truth test. I passed. I told her what happened, exactly as it happened. She warned me to not accept anymore drinks from anyone as there it was normal for those people. I silently obliged…

I went back to the dance floor, handled the repercussions of the vodka on my body and danced my heart out. Again, everyone around me was a bit drunk, and ditzy. Whereas, I was sober, as far as dizziness is concerned. We all danced like maniacs, but the thought came to my mind afterwards that people might have thought that it was vodka that made me dance crazy…

When I came back from the dance floor, ready to leave the party, I felt thirsty. I grabbed a water bottle from a nearby waiter. My mom instantly snatched it from me and tasted it herself to check that it was actually water. I smiled at her while taking back the bottle, but I was thinking… How different people see a particular act, when they come from a different background and environment!

Anyways, the night went well, and vodka gulp didn’t have any visible effect on me. Fingers-crossed…

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Living alone vs Living with a family

Living Alone vs Living with Family, which one would you prefer?

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When you live alone for long enough, you tend to develop mixed feelings for both these types of living habits.

I stayed away from my family for more than 5 years to complete my education. Thereafter, I have a job away from my family. However, mother or father or both do occasional visits to my place. And so do other relatives.

While I stayed with my family, I never had such thought in my mind. But now I am confused whether I like to stay alone more or with my family.

Look at my own-self argue with other regarding which lifestyle is better:

When we stay alone, we are totally free to do whatever we want. We can give our entire time to ourselves. There’s no one to give us any work, there’s no one to interrupt in our personal time.

While at the same time, there’s no one to talk to. There’s no one to take care of us when we are down with sickness or just depressed. There’s no one to look forward to when we are returning home. It feels lonely at times and depressing even.

But when we stay with our family, we can’t watch whatever we want on TV. Sometimes your favorite show coincides with that of someone in your family. (No you don’t have another TV and neither do you have recording facility). What if there’s someone elderly and their views about something are not the same as yours? What if all they talk about is God and your marriage? It’s better to stay alone than to handle this.

But then whom would you tell all the incidents from today? Whom would you play games with? Whom would you show the profile of your crush and ask for some ideas to approach her? Whom do you ask for a warm hug when you need it so dearly?

But then they invade your room without your permission! They keep on asking weird questions and annoy you. They use your things and change their places. They put their views above yours b’cuz they are elder. Their needs become your priority above your own personal pass time. Your free time gets occupied by their activities.

Nevertheless you were not going to do something great in that free time, were you? You were going to watch some stupid movie or waste your time organizing your library. Or you were going to go through all your friends’ updates and feel miserable about your life.

But then you missed that movie with your friends as you had to take your elder shopping. You missed your night out with your best friend as your family won’t allow you to do that. You couldn’t arrange that match at your house as your grandma won’t like it.

Yes, but no one is stopping you from enjoying. Family deserves your time too. And you can have lots of fun moments with your family too! And you can always mix your family and friends to enjoy events.

But you can’t enjoy the same way as you enjoy with your friends alone.

Vice versa applied too…

Yes but then there are lots of restrictions.

You consider them restrictions. They are only guidelines. For your own safety. And when we live with someone we have to take care of their needs to. Don’t your family takes care of you in all circumstances?

They do. But we don’t have to sacrifice our desires with friends.

Oh is it? Don’t you have to go with them even when you don’t want to? Doesn’t deciding a place to hangout makes you sick with all those arguments and discussions? Don’t you miss your brother or sister more when your friend doesn’t help you with something? You sacrifice in case of friendship too. And haven’t family members sacrificed a lot for you? Now don’t get me started on that…

Yes, but then as we grow up, we have our own views about life. We can’t follow someone else’s views. With change in time, we have to change our views. We have to accept new culture and move with it. We can’t live in past. But these elders at home won’t understand this.

True that. But that is generation gap. You have to make them understand. You have to prove it to them that what you think is actually valid and safe. It takes time and effort but remember that will help you too, when you’re on the other side of the table.

Do you think I wouldn’t have tried? I have tried explaining them my point but they always take the discussion to that point where it is question of their respect and seniority. And hence, we cannot speak anything further. Besides, don’t you think you lose your freedom while living with them?

Freedom is a relative word. What you consider freedom might not be freedom for me. While I might just solve all conflicts with a simple discussion with my family. There’s nothing a discussion can’t solve.

Yes, but discussions do not always come to your favour. While if you had been staying alone, there would be no need of these discussions.

But don’t you feel lonely at times while staying alone?

Yes, but I miss my carefree and independent life more…

But…

Their arguments would never end…! And I don’t think they will ever come to a conclusion either.
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What about you? Which lifestyle do you prefer – Living alone or Living with a family? Say in comments…

Complicated Relations

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Relations… How is one related to someone else? Is it maternal or paternal? Uncle, aunt, brother, sister, cousin, nephew, niece, in laws… English language has words for these relations.

But in Hindi language, the two words uncle and aunt, nephew and niece, and several other relations are given specific names.

Uncle being mother’s brother becomes ‘mama’. Uncle being father’s elder brother becomes ‘bade papa’. Uncle being father’s younger brother becomes ‘kaka’. And their spouses are ‘mami’, ‘badi maa’, ‘kaki’ respectively.

Aunt being father’s sister becomes ‘fayi’. Aunt being mother’s sister becomes ‘mausi’. And their spouses are called ‘fuva’ and ‘mausa’.

Courtesy can be given by adding ‘ji’ to each one of them.

Similarly, nephew being sister’s son becomes ‘bhanja’, brother’s son becomes ‘bhatija’. Niece becomes ‘bhanji’ and ‘bhatiji’ respective. (Don’t confuse ji at the end with the earlier one courtesy ji)

Further, sister-in-law and brother-in-law in Hindi is not that easy to understand. Find out yourself… (I took more than a decade to understand these words :P)

Sister-in-law for a wife is ‘nanand’. Brother-in-law for her, if elder than husband is called ‘jeth’ and if younger, is called ‘dewar’. Whereas, sister-in-law for a husband, if younger, is called ‘saali’ and if elder, then it’s called ‘jiji’. Brother-in-law for husband is called ‘saala’.

Spouse of jeth is called ‘jethani’, dewar is ‘dewarani’, nanand is ‘nanandoyi’, and spouse for both saali and jiji is ‘sadhubhai’.

Further, husband of sister is ‘jija’ and wife of brother is ‘bhabhi’.

And other woman or man is bhabhi or bhai if in formal relation, or else call using name directly.

Phewww…!

For my mind, this chapter of relationship was blurred. Hence, I had simple rules for defining relation name.

If he was elder and young, he was ‘bhaiya’ (brother), if elder and old, then ‘uncle’. Otherwise, his name. Similarly, if she was elder and young, she was ‘didi’ (sister), if elder and old, then ‘aunty’.

Only problem I faced was when elderly people asked me to call a specific one from the above list. For me all of them were either uncle or aunty, but when they required a work from a specific one, say mausi, which aunty would I call?! Stumped! πŸ˜€

But I had my ways… I would go to those group and yell whatever or whomever I was supposed to call. Then wait for them to respond. Everyone would turn and look at me, but only the correct one would respond to me by asking what was it. Bravo! I got the one! πŸ˜›

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My niece (bhanji) came to my house yesterday. Being a boy (not an uncle), I only see her as my younger sister. But elders in my family want to see me aged so early that they want that little one to call me uncle (mama).

Both she and I make faces when we are required to communicate in that way. But then she forgets to call me that often and calls me bhaiya . That brings a smile on my face, to see her do those crazy things and involving me into it.

I wonder if things were simple like my rules of defining names for relations, how would it be to live in my world. Would it be simpler than now or more complicated?

Wonder is all I can do…

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One more complain that I always have with elderly people here is that they always call my friends as bhai and behen (brother and sister)! Huh! How can they tell what’s in out little minds. Don’t they know there’s a word known as ‘friends’, which is different than she being called as my sister! Please! πŸ˜›

Small Bites with Family

A series of funny and interesting incidents that happen with me and my family.

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It’s festive time. After a long time, I got to visit my parent’s place.

It was lunch time. In the main hall, my father and I were watching the match. My mother entered the scene and asked us – “You guys ready for lunch?”

Instantly, me and my father, without seeing each other or planning or discussing, came down from the sofa on the floor and sat in the Indian position of sitting on the floor, being ready to eat.

And my mother gave an astonishing smile watching both of us do the same thing at the same time! πŸ˜€

If you could imagine that scene, and could see the expression on her face, that was a priceless moment.

In this post, I am sharing such little moments with my parents, which are sweet and funny at times.

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I fell asleep while studying. My mother came in and saw me sleeping on my reading table, my mouth open and a pen in my hand.

She came to me and started waking me up. Dad came in and said “Let him sleep. He would have been tired of all the studying.”

I was already awake. πŸ˜‰ However I stayed put, listening to their conversation…

Dad lifted me and put me to bed. Mom put the blanket on me. And then they saw me for a while and left the room.

That way I got to know how I used to wake up on my bed, while have slept at different places in my childhood, practically. πŸ˜›

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I was not able to sleep. God knows what was wrong, but every time I got a little dizzy, some weird nightmare would spoil it.

So I went to their room. They were asleep. I slept in the little space available between them. Instantly my dad put his warm hand on my head and mom put her comforting arm over me.

Needless to say, I slept like a baby (6 ft long baby that is) πŸ˜€

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It was the day I was returning home after a long time. And I didn’t tell them that I was coming home.

I knocked at the door in the way the milkman does in the morning. I imagined them telling each other to answer the door, while in sleepy mood in the morning. πŸ˜‰

Then mother came at the door with a utensil in her hand. πŸ˜€

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Dad was busy with his smartphone. Mum was busy with her smartphone. I was bored. So I planned a prank…

I clicked mum’s weird expression holding her phone, and sent it to dad. And clicked same for dad and sent it to mum.

Then they both saw it and laughed at the same time. I laughed too. So they looked at each other and then at me. They understood what just happened and I knew I was in trouble… πŸ˜€

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Mum was in the kitchen, cutting the salad.

I went in the kitchen and while talking to her, picked up a few pieces of carrot and ate them.

Then my dad went inside and did the same thing. And we both repeated this one after other when my mum shouted – “Both of you, stay out of kitchen or cut the salad yourself.”

We three laughed on that ‘cuz then she too ate a few pieces. πŸ˜›

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It was Diwali time. My dad had brought sweets for us.

After about two days, he went to check on those sweets, but found an empty box. πŸ˜›

He exclaimed – “Empty in just two days!! I couldn’t even taste one!”

Me and mum looked at each other and smiled evil… Now whenever he brings something new, he first tastes it and then puts it in the storage. πŸ˜€

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On Diwali, we prepare Rangoli at our place. But my mum and I both hate preparing the initial design. So we wait for dad to do it. Dad gets bored of it too, as he had to do it everytime. So he too shifts the work upon us.

Then in the end, it gets too late and we are left with little time. So, all three of us start doing the work together. And during that, me and mum ‘help’ dad some way, and dad, poor guy, has to fix everything that we have helped spoiling. πŸ˜€

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In summer, noon time on weekends is movie time at home. But dad always gets hold of the remote of the TV. So we have to watch what he wants to watch.

So, mum goes and sleeps on one of his hand. Then I do the same on his other arm. πŸ˜‰

Now both his hands are occupied, and the remote is free of his hands. Mission accomplished! The TV is in our control now… πŸ˜€

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After washing our hands, it’s time to dry them. But what if we can’t find the napkin?

That’s when I go to my mother and hug her. While hugging, her dupatta comes to my rescue. πŸ˜‰

And dad does the same thing. He goes to her, talks to her about something, and while talking uses the dupatta and walks away silently. πŸ˜€

Mother knows, but she only smiles at both of us… Silly.

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In my childhood, me, mum and dad used to travel in one single bike. I used to sit between them.

At times, when we travelled at night or during winter, I used to stick close to dad, as he is all weather warm. My mum used to hug me and dad together.

But dad has no one to do that. So to have some jealousy-fun, he used to stand up while riding the bike. So, all the cold wind used to come directly on my face.

Then I would do the same. I would stand up on the bike holding daddy. Now, all the wind would flow directly to mum. And now would be her turn. πŸ˜›

Riding together was so much fun…

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It is fortunate to have a family… Love yours, no matter how weird they are.

What to do on your birthday?

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Here are some ways to celebrate that not-so-grand-but-heavily-overrated-celebrationBirthday.

Social Way:
Go and explore your surroundings, you’d find various social causes to which you can contribute in some way.

For example, old age houses, orphanage, place for disabled (I prefer calling them specially abled), etc.

Those people would love to celebrate your birthday. Just go to them with balloons, cake and stuff, if you can, or just empty handed with a big smile on your face. I tell you, you’ll remember that day for whole of your life…

If you can’t find anything, donate blood. Probably cheapest way to help the society.

Nature-Lover Way:
Rise up early and go out to some point where you can clearly see the sun rise up from the ground (literary). See the birds flying, the fresh air and the smell of wet grass.

Go visit some village, if you are not there already. In India, we are blessed with so many naturally beautiful villages which are not taken over by Concrete Monsters :O (Yes, I love cartoons πŸ˜›)

Thanksgiving Way:
Celebrate your birthday by giving chocolates/sweets to people who help you in everyday life, like, watchman, laundry guy, garbage collector, milkman, etc etc.

Emotional Way:
Go spend time with your family, especially your mum. This was the day she first saw you πŸ™‚

Geek Way:
Go online and search the history to get what all happened on your birthday in past.

Bookworm Way:
Keep reading your books, buddy…

Lazy Way:
Keep watching that fan above your head spin round and round whole day long… πŸ˜‰

Food Lover Way:
Give yourself a treat mahn! Go eat out in some amazing and unique place you have never been to… Eat… Drink… Yummmm! πŸ˜‰

Cool (but outdated) Way:
Celebrate it with your friends and family… Go party hard.

Real Cool Way:
Do something new, you have never done before in your life, on each of your birthday… It can be anything, just anything, but it should be new and unique on each birthday. Cool, ain’t it!!! πŸ˜€

My way:
Wake up real late,
Don’t go to school/office or any such boring place,
Switch off your phone and dump all your responsibilities in the garbage box,
Don’t listen to anyone telling you to do anything,
My own manipulated version of ‘Real Cool Way’ stated above, (I won’t tell you what’s that :P)
Play guitar, sing all your heart out, beat those drums real hard,
Take out your Xbox and play Need for Speed like a maniac! πŸ˜€
(Yes, I’m a Music and Games lover too…)

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Missing Someone I Don’t Know

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I was starving… My stomach all sorts of sounds that it could possibly make. I understood its signals but couldn’t do anything about it. Firstly, it was raining outside and I had nothing to protect me from it. Secondly, I was all alone…

I was waiting for the rain to stop. But inside, I was waiting for someone I don’t know… Someone who could give me company – for dinner or for anything I do in my life.

It is human nature. They tend to search for someone to give them company and make them feel comfortable. We take our friends and family to shopping, movies, and almost everywhere where we could’ve very well go alone…

At the restaurant, the waiter asked me how many people with me. I said I’m alone (of course with great difficulty)! He arranged me an isolated place in the restaurant so that I can eat my dinner peacefully… And the other people who have come with their companies don’t make me feel uncomfortable.

But you can’t ignore the facts. Eating alone is very difficult when you don’t have such practice. All these years whole family eating on the table together had made me used to it. Now when I had to leave my hometown and stay alone in some different city I had some hard times…

After dinner, I usually take a walk or a long drive on my bike. It makes me feel peaceful and makes me ready to either go to sleep or gives me some idea to ponder upon… Even during these, I feel solitude creeping inside me. The roads, the trees surrounding the roads and everything else around looks at me strangely. They might be wondering that who would go on a walk alone! But I break their assumptions…

I wonder whether it would be the same if I had someone with me! Or it would be just same situation with talking in addition! I don’t know.. But nothing makes me desperate to have someone cuz other people’s experiences have given me negative reviews…

But still, a friend or family would have been a better company than my smartphone… It would have been a delicious dinner and a better time! At least, I wouldn’t have written all these sentences.. πŸ˜›

Anyways, my day was over and I was off to bed. I closed my eyes and slowly left my mind at rest.. But it took a long time to actually fall asleep. I was missing someone I don’t know yet.. πŸ˜‰