A Visit to the Human Shop

How the world would have been if we were not at the top of the food chain…

A animal kid narrates down his day’s experience at the human shop.

… …

I was very excited that day. I had never been to a Human Shop before. My friends told me that it’s a paradise for shopping for human products. You can find all the articles ans artifacts made from or relating to humans.

At the entrance, there was a huge statue of human. He looked so cute, and even more delicious! I wondered how others can be vegetarian! I felt the hunger as soon as I saw this little fellow…

I entered the main hall and whoa! I was left open-jawed! So many shops… So many shops!! (Repeated for emphasis)

The place was filled with animals of all kinds. From carnivores to herbivores, from four legged to two legged, from land animals to birds… It was a carnival at that place.

I understood that the crowd was due to the announcement last week about a special sale on human products this whole week. No one in their right mind would let such an opportunity pass.

My eyes instantly went to the apparels store. I couldn’t stop myself from rolling my paws over the smooth human skinned jacket. The smell of the skin was so overwhelming.

I grabbed the jacket and went to the trial room. And as soon as I put it on, it felt a part of my body. I couldn’t let it go away from myself.

Wow and they had brought new collection! So many patterns of beautifully made human skin apparels! I just wanted them all…

I looked for the stuff I wanted. But it was hard to overlook other collection as well. The shopaholic in me was coming out of the cocoon.

Main shopping being done at the apparels store, next I went too the food section, my personal favourite…

Ah the smell of hot human fries and human spicy delight..! I couldn’t resist myself from dancing and hopping towards the smell.

I ordered Eyeball salad for starters along with some wine, and started scanning the menu for next dish to order.

While choosing from so many options, I even got carried away by the snapshots of human dishes printed on the menu. I hoped this restaurant made these dishes as tasty as they looked good in these pictures.

I finally ordered my favourite saucy finger-rolls and crunchy meat balls.

While the cook inside was testing my patience, I looked around to see what was happening. All sorts of animals were having a fun time. I saw kids playing with their human hand toy, beating each other. While two adults were discussing business in a corner. And next to me a young dog couple was tasting each other’s parts.

The doors of the kitchen opened and I headed the cries of those humans while the cook was trying to get the hold of it to chop his head off. Poor thing I felt, but tasty my stomach said… After all, what good use are they otherwise!

My order finally arrived and I ate each piece of human with utmost delight. That taste of its roasted skin, that crunch of its deep fried pieces and those delicious finger-rolls… With chili sauce! Yummm!

Now that my stomach was satisfied, I switched back to shopping.

My friends had also shared with me about a human pet shop. I went to that section and saw to my surprise, there were so many human pets available there.

There were cute ones, new-born ones, athlete ones and simple homely types. I observed each one of them. It is said that you can’t just choose your pet, your pet should choose you too.

It happened with me. A new born one looked at me and I looked at it. It was so cute and so innocent. I instructed the shopkeeper to open the cage and let me try my luck with this little human.

When I took it in my hand, it cuddled me so innocently. I felt like it was telling me to take him away from this cage. I purchased my first pet…

I also bought a nice iron strap to tie its upper body. It would be risky to trust a human without precautions.

As I was going out, I saw a huge and scary human. It was uttering something in anger. I asked the shopkeeper why was it so weird. The shopkeeper replied that it was a blood-hound type. It was used as a security helper. Usually by police, they were very good at protective instincts.

I felt good that humans are useful in several distinctive ways. Good we animals discovered so many ways of using these humans!!

Next I went to the furniture shop. My dad had asked me to buy some good human heads to hang on the walls of our office. It brings good luck they said.

But it wasn’t easy to buy human heads. They had to be cleaned and washed with chemicals so that they don’t smell or get spoiled due to defabrication.
I bought a few other items like fresh human hair, some household items from the Bones store. The bones store here was famous for having freshly extracted bones which were thrice chemically washed and polished to keep them shiny and dust-free.

My time was running out. I went to the last section for the day – the Human Zoo.

Here, at The Human Shop, the Zoo was way different than the normal Zoo outside. It was a museum cum exhibition cum sanctuary of different kinds of humans. All races, all types of humans were collected from different parts of the world and showcased here.

There was a history section were we could see the artificially made sculptures of extinct human races. I read few of the exhibits and found them to be so informative.

There were few live human cages where we could see humans live and survive. The way humans communicated with each other was so weird. I couldn’t understand anything. But there are animals who study in this subject and they have researched that humans have highly developed communication techniques amongst other animals. Interesting, ain’t it?!

I moved on to the circus section of the Zoo where humans were trained and maintained to do entertaining and dangerous tricks.

The lion sir made a human stand on one leg with a whiplash. Then the human balanced with one leg on a ball! So cool!

Then Giraffe sir and Elephant sir threw the human over the ropes where it clinged on to the ropes and did some amazing stunts.

I wondered what humans would have done in this world if they were given complex brain structure like us animals…

Science sections had practical demonstrations of human body and their natural system.

In one show they showed human body and its parts by operating a live one infront of us. I couldn’t watch that sight so I moved on.

In another, they showed human reproducting system. Two humans were made to get intimate and the speaker explained how their natural breeding practice was similar to ours.

Everything there was so interesting and informative. But as we all know, time is never enough…

My day was over and now I had to go home. I took all my purchases and my pet with me to the cab pickup point.

I called a human cart. I instructed the handler to ride me to my destination. He whip-splashed the human hard enough that it jumped and started running at one instant. I personally hated the way these human were treated and beaten up for carting. But we didn’t have any other faster transportation.

Sometimes, we animals treat these humans in ways so in-animal. But what can be done..! After all, they were supposed to help us animals…

On my way home, I thought about how humans were exploited by us animals. I thought of so many ways in which the conditions could be made better. But this is what we all do, isn’t it? We just speak about it and do nothing…

I paid the cart handler and stroke the human on its back. It had tears in his eyes… Probably some day, things will turn out better for these human beings.

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