Moments of Dumbness


Imagine a situation where you and your girlfriend go to watch a movie. And one of your friends, who has also come to watch the movie, to your dismay, calls you, loudly in the hall. You turn and say hey. And he says “Hey! Wha’up here?”.
(Such an ad has also been made)

You look around for something heavy to answer his dumb question, or to put it right, to hit him on his face. 😛

In your life you’d have faced many such dumb questions. Sometimes, these questions will give you itchy hands (a desire to beat them up) and other times, it will just make you feel sick. But if we recollect those times, they feel stupid and totally hilarious.

So here I serve you with some Dumb Questions that I have survived…

We Gujuratis have a custom or habit to meet people with a positive assumption of their well-being. Hence instead of asking them how they are, we ask them whether they are having fun. (“Majama?”)

I was sick and was tied to bed by my mother and the doctor. People usually come and pay visit when you’re ill. So different people came in my room in different get ups and having different expressions, but with same question – “Having fun?” (“Majama?”).

How can I be! I was moving from sickness of body to sickness of boredom, and all I could do was smile to answer their dumb question…

I was having a hard time waking up. The sleepiness was not loosening its hold on me. I went to the bathroom and came back after a few minutes. I took my towel and clothes and was going inside the bathroom that someone in my house asked me -“Done bathing or what?”

Wasn’t it obvious?

After a hard day at office, I finally gathered the strength to stand up and leave for my bed, which was incidentally at my home. I opened the gate of the front door with bag on my shoulders and keys in my hand (and desperation on my face), that my boss called me from behind – “Are you leaving?”

No, he had no work or no such intention to keep me put for some more time. He himself was leaving behind me. But sometimes, there’s no limit to dumbness.

I was travelling from market place to home. On my way, I met an old friend of mine. He wanted to go somewhere and needed a lift. But the way he asked for lift was very frustrating…

Friend: “Hey! ‘Sup? All well?”
I replied casually.
Friend: “So where are you going?”
I said I was going home.
Friend: “So how would you go there?”

I was riding a bike, so definitely I was not going to park my bike aside and take a long walk with him…!

It was raining. I was fully drenched in water. But as I had no umbrella or raincoat or anything with me, I had no other option but to get washed in the rain along with my bike.

I reached office on time, but fully soaked and soaped, thanks to the acidic rainwater causing lather. I was struggling with my bag and leaking clothes to walk as normally as I could. But the quirky office shoes made some crunching noise that all my efforts to walk unnoticed to my desk were washed away (in the rain, of course).

One of my colleague came to me, laughing, and said – “Hey! What happened!? Why all soaked up!?”

I wanted to answer ‘I had a nice dip in a swimming pool filled with fruit beer!’ but ended up shrugging my shoulders…

It is said by someone great that when you want to reach somewhere in hurry, the whole universe conspires against you to put hurdles on your way…

I was very late for my meeting and, as if this wasn’t enough, my bike got a flat tire.

I was dragging it with me, as that was not a safe place to park it. I was searching for a garage. I asked a person at a tea stall if he knew a garage nearby. He looked at the flat tire and then answered – “No I don’t happen to know any garage nearby. What’s the issue? Puncture?”

I said – “Nah! It is just my hobby to suck out all the air from the tire and take the bike for a ride. Good exercise you see!?” and moved on… (Yes, this time I said it)

Now this one here is epic!

I was in the water closet. It took a little more time than normal as I was wearing formals and I was having difficulty in tucking in my short length shirt (Now that I think about it, I don’t understand it either :D).

When I came out of that door, my boss was standing at his desk and looking over the desks, searching for me of course. He called me and asked – “Where were you?”

You might not have got the dumbness yet. Let me explain it to you. The way to lavatory in my office is one way and visible to all eyes sitting anywhere across the hall, including my boss. So, when I walked out through that door, things were pretty simple for a dumb person to understand where was I and what was I doing. But my boss is not that dumb 😛

After my reply there was another epic question – “All this time?”

When it comes to talking with child, we must leave our brilliant minds aside and talk childish. But sometimes, even grown ups ask children such questions that they are left face-palming.

I was traveling. Besides me was a family with a child, probably of 10. She was inquisitive and kept on asking different questions.

A lady sitting next to the family asked that little girl – “What class are you studying in, little princess?”

The girl replied – “Mummy, tell this lady that I don’t talk to strangers.”

Her mother smiled at the lady and said – “My baby! How do you know she’s a stranger? You don’t know her yet!”

The girl looked stumped. She looked around rolling her eyes, which then fell on me. I winked at her and gesturing that her mother’s a dumb. She smiled back and nodded in approval. 😀

We talked several child-teen-little-sister-big-brother stuff that night of overnight journey. 🙂

When it comes to dumbness, no one is exempted – not even me 😛

I used to see planes passing over my house at night. One day I asked my mother – “Mum, why doesn’t this plane collide with the moon when it passes from it?” O.o

I thought sky was like earth, a huge ground opposite to our earth, with moon being a protruding reverse bowl on the ground (a hemispherical mountain) with lots of street lights on it… 😀

(Don’t laugh like that! I didn’t even know how to spell moon then, way before pre-school) 😛

Did you have such moments of dumbness in your life? 😉


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